Finding the Balance between helping yourself first and helping others

Sometime self help can sound like this: ‘you need to put yourself first’ or ‘you are your first priority’. I agree with this - if you need some time for yourself and you need to care for yourself first. But for some of us, we need to care for others, too; there may be people that rely on us - friends, family, work, etc.

So how do we find the balance between self care and caring for others? Maybe they are not so clear cut.

I like to think of it this way: if you take care of yourself and deal with your emotions first, you’ll be in a better position to help others. Of course, that’s not the only reason why you should look after yourself, but if you need a solid reason to take a break from friends, you can use that ^^.

Some questions to ask yourself:

1. Does this person need my help right now? The time you use to respond doesn’t need to be used for yourself time necessarily. This question can just help you take a step back from being ready to drop everything at once to help someone else.

2. Is there something that’s been bothering me that I can talk to someone about? You deserve care from others, too! Make it a conversation rather than a one way emotional dumping on you. Work it out together, so you can both leave feeling a little better than before.

3. Am I ready to talk with this person right now? Do I need to take some time before we can chat about this?

Let us know your thoughts on these questions and the topic.